The Step Family 2012 Year in Review is a study of love, traditional step family frustrations and a lesson in step family perspective. Three events come to mind.
- The Olympics where we all witnessed the deep devotion and love of a stepfather for his son.
- The gossip between Brandi Glanville and LeAnn Rimes continued. Both women love their children and are finding their way.
- The horrible tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut reminded us that most of our worries and complaints are just not important.
We watched as Danell Leyva, brought home the Olympic All-Around gymnastic bronze medal for the United States. The United States men’s gymnastic team had not brought home an All-Around medal for eight years prior to Danell’s performance. The real beauty of this athlete’s performance was the deep love that he and his step dad had for each other. Yin Alvarez, Danell’s step dad, devoted his life to supporting Danell’s ambitions. Mr. Alvarez’s passion and devotion for his son was palpable as you watched him in the stands. The hugs between the two men reeked of love. It was a great showcase for the love and loyalty that step parents have for their children. It was a triumphant moment for all of us.
Brandi Glanville, the biological mom, and LeAnn Rimes, the stepmother, continued to work on creating a cohesive life for their two boys. It is apparent that both women want the best for the boys, but they have mirrored most of our own experiences in that they have had their struggles. Although horrible for them, their struggles and their triumphs have played themselves out in the press. There have been beautiful times of support for one another and times where egos have gotten in the way. Recently, LeAnn referred to her stepchildren as “her” children. Every bio mom knows that feeling when you hear those words from the next wife. In reality, this is a term of endearment, but for a bio mom, they are fightin’ words. Given time to think about it, any bio mom would want this kind of devotion from the stepmother. Don’t we all recognize these reactions and feelings? In 2013, I believe that we will be talking about how this family has found its way. In 2012, both women have been brave examples of a step family working through their issues.
At the end of 2012, we all experienced the horrific murders at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Twenty-six people were killed, including twenty first grade children. Immediately, thoughts rushed to “How can this happen?” and “This could have been me and my children”. What if it had been one of your children? Your stepchildren? Suppose one of those murdered educators had been the ex-spouse? Think about it. Wouldn’t we all be devastated and destroyed? If one of your stepchildren lost their bio parent, their lives would change forever. The last thing any of us would want is to lose one of our family members or have to explain this type of loss to any child. When tragedy hits, step families and “regular” families are the same. All families realized that love is love is love. We don’t want to lose any one. With this focus in mind, we can start 2013 with an empathetic heart.
Happy New Year!