Category Archives: Education

STEPMOTHER LAMENT: TRY TO SEE IT MY WAY!

Many of you have asked about how the Couples Retreat went.  As you may be aware, Jenna Korf and I held our first Couples Retreat last weekend (June, 2017).  It was an ultimate dream for us.  After all, what would be better than to have a chance to coach both Dad and Stepmom together?  Nothing is better than that!

Let me share the gist of the weekend. We taught partnership.  When you truly think about most complaints that plague step couples, powerlessness and disrespect are front and center. The lack of true partnership rears its ugly head.  When you act as a team, the right hand knows what the left hand is doing.  Decisions are made together.  Then, those decisions get executed down to the children.  Yes, “down” to the children.  If you are looking up and seeing the children at the top of your family organization chart, that is not  partnership or leadership.

For those of you that find yourself feeling as if you are last in line, your natural question may be, “How do we change our family dynamics?”  The answer is that you invest in your partnership.  You go to school.  You educate yourself.  Stop pretending as if you can figure everything out on your own.  None of us can.  The Couples Retreat will reappear on our Retreat schedule next year as well.  (www.StepmomSanctuaryRetreat.com)  Before then, we have one more Stepmom Retreat scheduled for October, 2017.  Either program is life changing and marriage saving.  You can check out our testimonials page and see what our participants’ thought.)

Did I mention that members of my family participated in the retreat?  We did a real life Q & A with adult stepchildren, bio children and my husband. Any question was okay and nothing was rehearsed.  I found it quite moving and I plan on extending invitations to family members to join us at future retreats.  The most important part was that I cooked all weekend!  Yes, I cooked lunch and  yummy snacks and everyone loved them.  (At least that’s what they said!) So, if you would like your partner to “try to see it your way” and vice versa, we would love to meet you.

All the best,

Barb